Psalm 94:19 “In the multitude of my thoughts within me thy comforts delight my soul.” KJV
Are there days when you just struggle to keep your thoughts together? Not the normal where’s my car keys thoughts or what did I come into this room for thoughts or what are we having for dinner thoughts. I mean the swirling, loud, often pointless thoughts that rush into your mind at the most ridiculous moments. When you are in the middle of what seems to be a deep moment of reverent thought, you find yourself thinking of something as ridiculous as what people might have thought of your dress at your senior prom or whatever possessed you to skip school that day you got caught at the beach or why on earth would that cop give you a traffic ticket in the middle of a hurricane evacuation. You wonder what might have happened if you had not been drinking that night or what could have happened if you had gone to that job interview or would your son have become a drug addict if you had not left him at such a young age. The evil one knows your weakest points and he is quick to take advantage of them when you are feeling vulnerable.
Usually I would try to fix things myself. I do something wildly unique to clear my mind like go shopping, go shopping, or go shopping. Since my recent downsizing of income, I couldn’t very well go out to drown my voices with a bag full of stuff from Lifeway. I usually try to justify my buying spree’s there by throwing in a Veggie Tales movie for the grandchildren. Sadly, the publication of new Veggie Tale movies does not keep up with my need to visit the store. I need to send them some story ideas I guess.
My Abba saw me floundering around and sent me some serious distractions that are costing me nothing but sanity. And since I have so little of that left, it has been basically free for them. This week my grandchildren have come to visit again. For the first time in their young lives, they have their grandmother’s full attention. We have been to the pool, been on picnics, played hot wheel cars in the living room, played angry bird on grandma’s phone (because grandpa won’t get it on his phone), and had dessert every night. Grandma made carrot cake and blueberry muffins and even allowed them to have hamburger helper. (I went to Bible study because I heave at the smell of that stuff but you didn’t hear that from me) It’s also why I am writing this blog in the middle of the night instead of first thing in the morning.
I think that sometimes what we think of as an inconvenience, is God telling us that we need to see it as a comfort to our soul. We are so overwhelmed with what we think we have to do that we forget what we need to do. Today as I pushed a car around a little orange piece of track, as I watched my granddaughter jump off the diving board, as I grated carrots until my fingers turned orange, it suddenly occurred to me that my voices were silenced. All I was hearing was laughter and voices and comfort to my soul. In the midst of all the noise and chaos there was peace. Well, in my heart anyway because five minutes later, everyone was grounded for fighting over the wii. And Grandpa was smart. He left for California. God was good to him too.