Psalm 37:4 “Delight thyself also in the LORD: and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart” KJV
As I read through Rachel’s guest blog yesterday, I realized that I am guilty of not thanking my sweetheart enough for all that he does for me. And as strange as it may sound, even if he isn’t doing anything at all, just knowing that he is willing to do anything for me keeps me far away from the darkness of low self esteem. He is “the desire of my heart”, the gift I was given when I stopped searching for someone to love me. Whether it’s surprising me with a writing room, decorated and full of the things he knows I love, or the fact that he is willing to sleep under a fluffy, flowery, girly quilt in a pink bedroom (hey! the salesman said it was a salmon color…who knew salmon considered a shade of pink), his love for me is always evident.
I am, as my family will tell you, scatterbrained and headstrong. I can’t remember any one’s birthday and even now I have to get out my day planner to tell you when my anniversary is. I hate to clean, finding creative ways to make artwork out of dustbunnys instead of getting rid of them. It makes your husband smile if you write “I love you” on the dust of the tv screen. (or at least I think he is smiling) I will use the dryer as a dresser if left to my own devices thus bringing a loud drawn out sigh from my military minded, pressed and folded sweetheart. My theory on dishwashers is that I should never have to pre rinse the dishes. Exactly what is the point of that? If I am going to all that trouble then I might as well wash them by hand. So everything is set on super hot, pots and pans, steam the germs off cycle. And if that doesn’t work, there is always the age old standby of running the dishwasher again. Two wash cycles never hurt anyone.
Sweetheart and I traveled not just a broken road to get to each other but basically it was a superhighway of potholes, washed out bridges, unexpected u turns, and stretches where the pavement was gone, leaving only a rutted gravel footpath. We made so many mistakes in the beginning we were the king and queen of the kingdom of “I am sorry” which is right next to the land of hypocrites anonymous. We were the poster children for how not to start a marriage. The only thing I can say is at least we didn’t “have to” get married, although if we were any younger (and I hadn’t made sure I couldn’t have more than 6 kids) , I am sure that would have been added to our list of things we shouldn’t have done.
The day that we met the Lord, we were standing in a new church, in a new place, broken and brought to our knees, knowing that we needed more than each other to keep going. Sometimes one person in a marriage meets the Lord first. Days, weeks, months, even years can go by before the other finds their way to Him. I was so blessed to have been holding hands with my sweetheart the day our lives changed forever. The day we said yes to Jesus being the foundation of our marriage. I used to think that the day my sweetheart got down on one knee in front of our friends and family, asking me with tears in his eyes to be his wife forever, was the day he won my heart. Now I can tell you that day paled in comparison to the day sweetheart turned to me and said that he wanted to be baptized.
Every day, my sweetheart gives me the gift of his love. I keep this gift safe from all that would seek to steal it from me. I may lose birth dates, I may lose track of time, most definitely I am losing my mind. But I will do all I can, each and every day, to show my sweetheart that he is the most precious of gifts that my Father in Heaven gave to me. A gift I will never lose. Sweetheart and I made a promise that we would say I love you every day, even if we said it through gritted teeth. We have kept that promise, even saying it through gritted teeth! Every day we put another layer of wrapping paper on the gift that is our love for each other, making it stronger and stronger. I love you sweetheart. You are the delight of my heart.